Dr Jenny’s Jab: A lesson in perseverance

G’day. Now we’ve all been stuck with the odd encounter or three with Bureaucracy! Your call is important, would you prefer to chat on line, and if and when you finally get through, you can’t understand their accent anyhow!

With all that in mind, you have to feel for Dr Jenny, who had enjoyed a few of the Humble Heroes stories and decided that she would make her contribution as a GP to administer the vaccine and expedite the roll out. Her frustration with the bureaucracy was so acute it spilt out in a letter to me.

Dear John – to cut a long story short, I thought I should put my shoulder to the vaccine roll out and offer to help out. Having been out of general practice for a few years, I do the mandatory three hour online training program for vaccinators even though I’d been doing vaccines for 40 years

Then our Practice manager was told that I need to do paperwork to enable me to work at the practice. I’m happy to be voluntary I suggested – no, no, can’t be for legal reasons.

After much searching we find my old Provider number so now I’m all set as time is running out to help out in the weekend clinic that is short staffed.

No, says bureaucracy, that provider number is Inactive and I must register with Proda.

So I start registering with Proda, my street as a child, favourite dog’s name, school attended, Drivers Licence, Medicare number, passport details – done. Thank God for that, the clinic is on the next week.

No, doesn’t match because I‘ve always practiced under my maiden name – why they just didn’t check with the registration authority I wouldn’t know.

So begin the endless calls and I’m told to be courteous in what I say and they will be too. Now I need to submit my marriage certificate, now where would that be?

Each time I phone and try to talk to someone, after hanging on for ages again we go through, street I lived in, dog’s first name school attended, and a different person each time again reminding me to be courteous and they will be too. By now I have spoken to about six people, repeating my story each time.

Ah, you are not using your married name! No, never have, I have always practiced under my maiden name. Ah, sorry, you will need to fill out a change of name form, now more phone calls as search doesn’t bring up the correct form. Finally I’m told which form it is .. I scan it and submit it with marriage certificate. Sorry, your Provider number is not working. Please hold while we transfer you to the provider number department. . and I hold for ten minutes. Then a senior provider number consultant informs me that my details aren’t matching. I explain again, yet at no time did they ask me for my Registration details.

Now it’s two days before the clinic. Finally after getting my local Federal politician involved, I get through to the senior officer in Department of Health and she needs your banking details. Right, done. Proda now tells me to submit!! Ha at last, finished.

“System unavailable” it tells me. I try three more times. Friday morning. Clinic tomorrow. Still can’t submit banking details.

I ring Proda again. Can’t help. “Try Medicare to help with banking details”.

Now Friday afternoon – at 4.40pm helpful Medicare lady changes old banking details to new ones.  No form needed! Hallelujah. I send her flowers down the phone. And a box of chocolates and champagne!

Finally all sorted. Their consultant phones me to ask if it has all gone smoothly!

I spluttered something back at him, meanwhile the office is due to close in 10 minutes and it’s not fully resolved, After 10 more calls and my blood pressure needing more medication, this gentleman suggests the problem may be I’m using the wrong “link” number, first time I’ve heard the word. At that point I have a total melt down and it’s after 5. I try to ring the surgery, but it’s now after 5 so I get their answer machine. I phone this courteous man back and inform him in no uncertain terms that tomorrow I will be giving the jabs even if it is illegal and I go to jail. And slam the phone down.

Saturday I do the clinic. It’s enjoyable. Patients are grateful.

Monday, Proda calls back to check how thing went!!

Dr Jenny, could I just say it would be my pleasure to visit you in jail and give you my Humble Heroes award for Perseverance,