John Howard: A lesson in values

G’day. You might think you’re busy but what if you’re the Prime Minister and trying to do the right thing by your kids, your party, your colleagues, your country – surely you’re entitled to call yourself busy.

When it comes to impressive busy people, few have impressed me more than John Howard, our ex-PM. Regardless of your politics, everyone, on both sides of the chamber, knew where they stood and where he stood.  His commitment to his country, his values and his family were his unshakeable anchor. When I wrote my “Who’d be a parent” book”, John agreed to contribute. This extract reminds me why he was so much admired.

My first question to him was, being so busy, how do you keep a good balance of parenting and public life?

JH: “When Janette and I first discussed the realities of a political career and the possible effects on our family, we resolved that the most important consideration was to provide a stable and loving environment for our children.

I often recall the advice given to me as a new Member of Parliament by Peter Nixon, a former Minister in the Fraser government. Speaking of the importance of the family, he said “stay in touch every day and if you say you’ll be home for something, be there”.

Politics is such an all-consuming thing for a family, we have also shared the successes and the challenges of my political career. Some of the hardest times for Janette and me as parents were to see our children disturbed by the publicity surrounding me during the difficult times, but as a family, we have always discussed the issues and got through them together.

Me: How have you survived the hard times?

JH: Very often the hard times begin to look like the good times because they are the times that people who love each other really pull together. Most parents find that their children do get caught up in their challenges or problems. This is inevitable, naturally children do worry about their parents - probably more than many parents realise. As parents we all have to watch this and make sure that our children know that we value their love, help and concern.

Me: What tips do you have for families?

JH: I believe that bringing up children is the most important thing most people do in their lives and nothing replaces time spend with your children. Encourage them in their endeavours, cheering their successes, giving them your shoulder when they don’t succeed.

Good parents teach their children the values they will live by. This might be ordinary things like the value of work, earning a living, preparing for the future, managing what they have and sharing it when they can, and facing reality front on in the good times and the bad. For example, we have encouraged our children to have some degree of self-sufficiency that comes with earning their own pocket money through after school jobs and I know that they have learned through this.

There is probably only one thing more important that teaching your children and that is learning from them. A great many of the valuable lessons that I have learned in the past 23 years have come simply from talking to my children and watching them grow. You must always take the time to talk, no matter how busy you are”.

No need for me to say a thing. John Howard, thank you for your impressive role in my memoirs. Welcome to my Humble Heroes Hall of Fame.