Mother tributes: A lifetime lesson in unconditional love

G’day. I’m sure you knew the faults of your mum but - loved her nevertheless - for all the sacrifices made to give us a start – regardless of their own pain, loneliness, sadness, - feeling of not being needed any more or - even their own failings and frailties. I will never stop praising my mum or any mum - for those long hard yards each and everyone put in.

I’m reminded of some of the genuine and heart-felt stories in a fabulous book - “Who’d be a mother”. One such contributor was Carolyn Lee, - a freelance writer who put her feelings about the experience of motherhood this way:

   "I find it hard to admit this - but my reasons for choosing to have a baby were not thought out -or even realistic. Back then - I saw pregnancy, childbirth, breastfeeding and caring for a small child as essentially sensuous, - enriching experiences that I wanted to have for myself.

it simply never occurred to me that the act of creation, - particularly of a new life, - is all about giving and giving and giving.

But babies are good teachers. - mine quickly showed up the destructiveness of all my selfish and self-centred notions. ‘ It was a painful time and the learning process is probably still unfinished"

As mere male, I emerge from such testimonies - with the belated feeling that those who have been there - have an understanding and feeling for humanity - that the rest of us can never quite grasp. And when you think about it,- who in their right mind would lightly take on the mantle of motherhood. Look how the JD reads:

WANTED ONE MOTHER..

* Hours of work - 24 hours by 24 years, -[so pace yourself and find space for yourself].

* Holidays - nil -[so be selfish, two weeks in a caravan mightn't suit...short trips, decent break or swapped roles might]

* Qualifications - University of you-name-it expected, -[so in-service training through friends, family, Playgroup, kids' clinic, magazines and telephone essential]

* Salary - costed at $1200 + per week -[so don’t settle for just free board and beggings]

* Travel - plenty of opportunity for travel, - mainly to school, after school activities and supermarket - [so make sure you have easy means of getting to shops, parks and friends]

* Promotion - nil - [so be careful not to achieve through your kids - and find some areas that give personal satisfaction]

* Tenure - permanent - [so don't panic over a few mistakes]

Maybe next Mothers Day you could advertise the job at home and if you’re selected - put your conditions in writing and mean it.

Of course our feelings about mum change as we age. As one e-mail described it:

At age 4 -  ~ My Mummy can do anything!

At 8 -  My Mum knows a lot! A whole lot!

At12 - My Mother doesn't really know quite everything.

At 14 - Naturally, Mother doesn't know that, either.

At 16 - Mother? She's hopelessly old-fashioned.

At 18 -  That old woman? She's way out of date!

At 25 - Well, she might know a little bit about it.

At 35 - Before we decide, let's get Mum's opinion.

At 45 - Wonder what Mum would have thought about it?

At 65 - Wish I could talk it over with Mum

I do, too.

To all the mums, whatever your age or imperfections or infirmity. Thank you.